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It’s been a minute and I’m happy to be writing again. Lately, my life has been a steady green light. So, much, so that I’ve taken on the likings of a nice hot bath. It’s become of full on thing. It’s actually a true testimony in itself for so many reasons. I could start with the mere fact that the bathroom was where I’d go to cry for help. It’s the room where I shared my agony in peace. I never took it as my resting place until now. The old Denise loved to stay in misery. She never once would have allowed herself to take a bath and relax instead of cry. But, I have forgiven myself for that. I wasn’t well emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I can own that with honor because I know the work I continue to put into myself. I’m becoming the best version of me. Every experience leaves an energy behind and there’s a lot of bad stenches in the air. The bath allows me to release all of that of the world and receive the moment delicacy. I have to take full advantage of these moments. God has been preparing me for the next phase of my life and self care is a requirement for me to walk into it. Therefore, I don’t take my bath tub experience lightly.
I used to believe the only way to connect with God was on your knees, next to your bed or at the dinner table. Now, my time with God is spent in a hot bath. It’s something I prepare for as if it’s Easter Sunday. I shop LUSH products to create the energy needed to heal the days triggers and reclaim my energy. I usually start with cleansing the room. If you’re like me, I clean my bathroom on the daily basis but for the moments I choose to serenade myself, it’s a must that the room is cleared to receive me. Depending on if the kids are home, I decide ahead of time what vice I would have accompany me. Sometimes its wine, a book or maybe a joint. No different from the candy I ate during Church, I always have the option for a snack in all of my happy places. Tonight I decided to go with a glass of wine and a joint. Business is working me but God is good and what better way to show my affection than to show up calm and centered.
Now that I have all my added ale cart items, I begin to prepare my space for fellowship. I started by finding my perfect temperature water and begin to fill the tub. The water temp is so important. If it’s too hot, I don’t indulge long because I get uncomfortable by the heat. If the water is too cold… I’m not comfortable. It’s an entire process, I’m telling you. I begin to light my scented candles and I save my one white candle, that is surrounded by crystals, incent trays and bundles of palo santo. I keep this Sanctuary in the bathroom should anyone find the need to want to pray. It’s a private space within my home where you are welcomed to find peace. I never thought to have a need for a Sanctuary until I stopped attending Church. Not being a part of a Church home doesn’t change my relationship with God. I still had a need for an alter and just like in Church, if you walk through those doors, you are welcome at my alter.
Once the water has completely covered the bottom of the tub, my ceremony begins. The house is quiet so I can walk freely throughout my house. I pour myself a glass of a Sweet Red Cali… I love that shit. I holler at ALEXA to play our bath time play list. A list of Gospel and love songs. Whether it’s Reggae, R&B or Country, as long as its taking me to a place where I can feel joy and relaxation, its on the list. Once Alexa gets to sending out the correct soundwaves (because y’all know it takes a few attempts for her to act right) I begin layering my water. I start with a nice bath salt, about a 1/2 cup. Then I drop a few sprinkles of Florida Water, followed by some liquid gold – It’s used to soften the skin and provide a natural radiance and is full of high quality essential oils. I like to lather in bubbles and LUSH has some amazing bath bubbles. I typically buy the goat milk and honey bar but I’ve gotten frisky with some lavender and oat lately and I’m starting to think we have something.
By this time the tub is full and the entire bathroom smells amazing. It’s steamy, the candlelight’s has me feeling peaceful. I sit down in front of the Sanctuary and light the white candle. In this moment, I’m calling upon God to receive me. Thanking God for allowing me to bear the fruits of my heart and for freeing me from things not of thee.